advent begins ~ !

[lookingland]

I've never had an advent wreath and it was never a tradition in our home (and now is not the time to run out and get one!), but seeing as I will very likely be spending Christmas with my dogs this year, perhaps once I am settled in the new city, I will fetch some candles and do it up right.

Because I went to confession last night, I attended the advent kick-off vigil mass. I cried through the first half of it ~ for a lot of reasons, but mostly gratitude. I've always said to people that God has never, not once, failed to give me what I've asked for. I think at no time in my life has that been more evident than now.

1 Corinthians 1: 3-9 says "I give thanks to God always for you because of the grace of God which was given you in Christ Jesus" ~ thinking on the recent turkey-day celebration and the focus on thanksgiving and gratitude being at the heart of our walk with God (which it really is ~ without gratitude how easy it is to otherwise fall!). And I think about how many times the cause of my unhappiness has simply been ingratitude. May the Lord make us truly grateful ~ in that simple appeal is the key to all things, I believe. A grateful child is an obedient child. An obedient child is a happy child. A happy child walks in confidence.

The gospel reading about watching and waiting was also especially good for me to hear: I tend to put off things like going to confession, for example, because of all the excuses in the world I can conjure. And the truth is, the more I put these things off, or make excuses, the slippery the slope gets, the more lax I become, the sins start piling on (oh well, why not, I'm already in the mud, might as well roll around a bit). It's a terrible habit with me and the gospel today reminds me that we have to vigilant against temptation always. Just because we screw up doesn't mean we ought to just give up. True penitence is going forward in the "right", not sloughing off until we can be absolved again. I feel like I've been sleeping for quite a while. It's definitely time for me to wake up and be more watchful.

I may try to go back to St. Mary's one last time before I leave this city (possibly forever). I had not realized until last night how deeply I will miss it. One more thing to be grateful for.

Comments

[xstitchfla.livejournal.com]

I'm so glad to find that I'm not the only one who cries during Mass! I usually hide it well (too embarassed to be seen weeping I guess). A lot of times it's the music and the choir that gets me. Everything is so beautiful!

The gospel reading about watching and waiting was also especially good for me to hear: I tend to put off things like going to confession, for example, because of all the excuses in the world I can conjure. And the truth is, the more I put these things off, or make excuses, the slippery the slope gets, the more lax I become, the sins start piling on (oh well, why not, I'm already in the mud, might as well roll around a bit).

OMG you could have been reading my mind. I haven't been going to Mass lately because my husband has been working the weekends. I can't partake of the Sacraments because his previous marriage needs annulled (working on it!). So...my reasoning has been - since I can't receive the Sacraments anyway, if I miss Mass it's no big deal.

Well I woke up to the fact that two wrongs don't make a right therefore my patootie made it to Mass today. Like you said - time to wake up and be more watchful!!

I bought my first Advent wreath today. I will post some pictures later on when I get it set up and lit. Lovely picture you have there.

[lookingland.livejournal.com]

awww ~ thank you for sharing your thoughts here ~ and yay that you are starting the new year off on the right foot.

i'm usually pretty good at hiding the tears, but last night ~ oy ~ i was weeping pretty good up until the homily. then monsignor got long-winded and i got it under control ~ hahahaha ~

God bless you and i will keep the blessing of your marriage in my prayers.

: D

[xstitchfla.livejournal.com]

You're welcome!

Thanks for the prayers. Sometimes it gets me down when I think how long this process is going to take. I take comfort in the thought that God knows we are trying to do things right!

[sparowe]

Just because we screw up doesn't mean we ought to just give up.

So true. And that's hard for me... it's very easy to screw up and then just feel hopeless. *shakes head* Day by day process!

[geckobird.livejournal.com]

That was a beautifully written entry. And such a good reminder too. I've been putting off confession myself, and your entry really reminded me of what is true and right. :) Thank you.

:D

God bless, and I pray your move goes well and safely!