late night second thoughts ~

[lookingland]

wrote 1,951 words.

don't. like. hardly. any. of. them.

the line about the rhododendrons was okay:

rhododendrons and buckwheat cakes as big as dinner plates; the sound of the Sabbath choir singing Jesus makes my heart rejoice, I’m his sheep, and know His voice.

but otherwise i fear another false start. too too chatty. blither blither blah blah. i know i can cut when all is said and done, but the whole feeling is wrong. there are moments:

Poppet turned the handle of the same cup of cold coffee 45 degrees every few minutes, just to look occupied.

but overall the effect is too "staged". (i.e. now let's have that discussion about jurisdiction because we have to cram it in somewhere! ) and i'm still not 100% comfortable with some of the peripheral characters about whom i know so little. especially having them carry big scenes (i fear i've made Clampitt sort of an intolerant snob and that's not really fair).

meh.

i'm gonna go work on it.

how'd it get to be so late?

: o p