lookingland

i have a real problem with creative commitment. i can work on the same project for 20 years and never tire of it, but also never finish it. i also have this annoying habit of changing horses midstream constantly. in fact, i have so many horses in the race at this point, it's become impossible to leap from one to another without hitting a third in between.

but the truth is, i'm gettin' too old to keep falling in the water.

when i have been writing, i've been wanting to dispense with the narrative and at the same time make the work more visual. when i have been drawing, i get frustrated at my inability to render basic shapes ~ like cows (with special apologies for those of you who suffered through "the debacle that was a cow blessing" which sank my original launch of Razi-el's Dream two years ago).

i used to worry about being a disappointment to other people. then one morning recently i woke up and realized what a sore disappointment i am to myself.

and that's gotta stop.

so i've done the deed. i've committed myself to relaunching Reconstruction (the current content of that site, by the way, is going to vanish now that it's being replaced). i know, i know ~ i've relaunched this thing before. but the reborn version will be radically different and finally in the form it was originally intended.

after entirely too much angst, i have decided to slosh all of my writing together in one fantastic morass of sequential art; serialized, and completely random in order and context. presumably all of the stories will get told (from Figfield to Exposition) within the framework of Morse's attempt to reconcile Lewis Fletcher with Linwood Brown.

this feels "right" in a way it never has before. i think i have finally reached a point of realizing that i don't have to compromise. and i've been trying to think of something more to say about this, but i talk too much as it is.